jenny does japan, day one (part 1)

Our week in Japan for MateRock went so fast, and was full-on times a bazillion. I didn’t get time to blog on the trip, because I was lazy and drunk a lot so I’m going to break it down over a few blogs, before I forget everything…

We left Perth Wednesday flying Malaysian Airlines. We don’t normally fly with them, so we weren’t sure what we were going to get

We were hoping for airborn

What we got was 5 hours of non-stop food and niceness from the lovelies that were our flight attendants

A quick stop in Kuala Lumpur, then the same sensational treatment for another 7 hours

This trip was starting out better than a free foot rub

And we hadn’t even got there yet!

My next holiday is going to be just sitting on a Malaysian Airlines flight – never getting off – just kicking back, watching movies and feeding my face

If those planes could add a pond to fish in, I could even talk Diamond into coming

We arrived at Narita airport to meet the festival organisers and some of the other musos

Then we jumped on the bus for a 4 hour drive to Hakuba, where Saturday’s concert was being held

The 4 hour drive got stretched out to nearly 5 1/2 hours

On account of 3 stops and my constant need to take photos of the toilets

Those things are heated

And while none of the buttons you see in the pic (below) actually flush the thing

They will give your vajay-jay quite the splash, rinse or blow dry

I felt like a new girl

Next stop had one like this (below)

I acutally had to double check the sign outside to make sure I was really in the girl’s loo

It was

And I had a lot of trouble sitting on this thing for a wee

Most uncomfy on my bum bone

Makes sense really

‘Cause I was told afterwards that it’s for women to SQUAT over and pee in!

Score one for the dip shit Aussie tourist

Another stop was Okaya City

With amazing views and a STARBUCKS!

Fuck yeah!

Until it was time to throw my rubbish out

And I got all intimidated by the massive selection of bins that looked like Octomom had given birth to a litter of R2D2s

I still have my rubbish

It should be noted that the cake pops in Japan taste nothing like the ones I’ve eaten by the truckload in other countries

I’m pretty sure they laced these mothers with wasabi

Yep, not good at all

Anyhoo

After much driving, vajay-jay washing and rubbish hoarding

We made it to our destination

But wait, there’s more… but not yet ’cause I’m back in Kuala Lumpur, and the fabbo shops here close in 1 hour…BYE! (or is that BUY?)