Does anyone have a friend that you only see maybe once a year?
Calls you back weeks after you called them – if they call you back at all?
Never gave you back the casserole dish you left at her house over the holidays?
You loaned her your earrings that were passed down to you by your grandmother – your friend wore them to a wedding, got drunk and lost one?
She brings her kids to you house and they trash the joint
She tells you your husband is a dick – in front of your husband
I, ladies and gentlemen, am THAT friend
Who wants to catch up for coffee??
Let’s do it at your house! I’ll bring my kids, my husband and the promise of a casserole I never intended to cook anyway because I’ll never see the dish again. We can talk about the wedding you can’t remember attending and the earrings you most likely threw out a car window while sober, in a jealous rage because your Grandmother left you nadda zero. You just make sure you’re not home so no one is offended. You’ll talk about my visit for years to come because I forgot to remember you while you were away. I haven’t answered your calls because you NEVER CALL and I’m never there to answer them! Can’t wait to not get together again! It was memorable…I think?
Hey friend. Think I can fit you in for coffee 12 Dec 2009. Love yer work.