So, yeah, I’m not dead
I’m just home
Which means not much time for blogging and the like
And that’s more than OK
‘Cause I’m making the most of spending 24/7 with the fam
Pretty soon they’ll be begging me to go back to work (code for get the fuck outta here)
I’m sure there’s a bucket load of work stuff that I shouldn’t be ignoring and could be doing
Like writing
Or working on stuff for the new DVD
But dude, it’s SUMMER here in Chicago
As in, the SUN IS OUT motherfuckers
We wait SO long for that over here, that it’s hard to stay inside and be productive
When I’d rather hang outside by the pool, and do fuck all
Although today, it is hotter than an Ethiopian runner’s ball sack
So we’ve been doing all the indoor stuff
We just got back from the library
Where some old biatch lectured me about the rules, and how dancing with my kids in the public library, was against them
I asked her to show me where exactly the rules said that
But it was hard to get into a shit flight with an octogenarian, whilst simultaneously setting a how-not-to-act-like-a-crack-whore-in-public example for the kids
So I let the volunteer-grey-nurse-nazi tear me a new one
And I smiled
And walked away
As Miss 6 asked, are ALL old people that grumpy?
And Miss 4 wanted to know, why the mean lady had a beard
So we got outta there before I got busted again
This time for snort laughing & high fiving with children
.
Now they’re over hanging out with me
And are playing the game they like to call the ‘secret sister’s club’
That I can’t play because I’m a Mummy
And I won’t let them jump on me ’cause it hurts like a bastard and I bruise easily
And not having a sister makes me ineligible too
Whatever
I’ll just wait
They’ll totally want to play with me again soon
They’ll be begging me to go swimming
And not just because they’re not allowed to go in the pool without me
It’s because they LOVE ME
DUH!
Kids always LOVE YOU more in water…it’s a fact! Try getting in the water without them hanging on you and consistantly yelling out, “Mum, Mum look at me…look at me”. I couldn’t actually SWIM while they were young…they were on me like barnacles on a whale. Now that they are old enough to notice the obvious resemblance, they clear out like a seal spotting an orca as soon as I walk out in swimmers…